Milford -
Creating a comfortable and dignified death is the goal of Hospice of Eastern Maine.
But a special video project is also helping patients and their families create memories that will last beyond a lifetime.
For Ty Dubois, the pain of losing his wife of 58 years to cancer will never completely go away.
But sometimes, in the comfort of his living room in Milford, its almost as is if she never left.
"It turned out to be one our best decisions we made through the whole thing because we still have Onida with us when we want to."
That decision was to take part in Hospice of Eastern Maine's Legacy project.
With the help of Volunteer Kathy Vanaria, Ty and his family worked with Onida to make a video of her life before she died.
"It is painful in a way, yes, because the whole process has come about because someone is dying. But at the same time we're also celebrating their life. That's what this is - a celebration of the person's life."
The process of picking photos and sharing memories brought Onida's family together in her final days and gave her the chance to shape how she's remembered.
"My mother had the vetoing - was able to veto any picture that she wanted to," says her daughter, Diana. "My dad tried to take that over but no - we all stuck to it that my mom had the veto rights."
Diane says the video that grew out of that process is priceless.
"Look at her and see that big smile and see pictures of us when we're together and went camping and went and did all of these fun things and try to focus on that, rather than that she's not here."
"I might shed a few tears," says Ty. "But they're happy tears."
From remembering a woman who's now gone, but still living on.
"I don't think you can imagine how it enriches your life to have that - like myself, I can always have my wife in my living room ... Anytime time I want to."
Vanaria started putting together Legacy videos about three years ago but says fewer than a dozen families have taken advantage of the offer and she's hoping to change that.
To find out more about the help Hospice of Eastern Maine can provide and the Legacy Project, you can call 1-866-591-8843 or log on to www.easternmainehomecare.org.