I talk to a lot of people and you should know that arguments, special about money, happen at many peoples' houses.
Kids - Oh, the little darlings. We love them to pieces, but maybe I love them more than you because I will buy them things you and insist on them earning money. I have heard folks say that they grew up with nothing and they just have to take care of their kids' needs to the highest possible level. Even, and often, not taking care of their own future needs. I have frequently been able to help folks think in a different way by aksing if this lifestyle;e is what they would advise their children- as adults- to emulate. Do they want their, daughters, for instance, to neglect themselves in the future and give over all their money to the kids? The answer is usually no…
Who earns more- You love each other and need to find a balance with that fact as your focus. If you have separate accounts or divide the bills, in this case you may divide them proportionately, and not simply 50/50, cause that division would not be equitable. I have seen folks with more income be a real bully to the less well-earning partner. That's not love, kids. Look yourself in the eye and imagine how your activity or behavior would look if you saw it in another couple, your best friends. How would you see that behavior?
Family / Ex-family- You may argue because family intervenes in your money lives. Are their grandparents who insist on gifts that make one or both of your uncomfortable? Do you have an ex who makes more than the new family, from whom you still have financial ties of debt ? Speak to a counselor to help you sort out a better approach since this can be all wrapped up in emotions that have nothing to do with the present situation. Be efficient, make things better now!
Spending / Saving- It's not uncommon to have one partner be a spender and the other be more or a saver. These descriptions are neither bad nor good. They are just different and you love that about your baby! But under certain circumstances these differences can be more difficult. Have a talk about how to balance these characteristics and make a lovely and harmonious outcome that uses the best in both of you for your family.
Citations:
Marion R. Syversen, MBA - President
NorumbegaFinancial
207.862.2952
Marion@NorumbegaFinancial.com
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Couples and Money Arguments
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